Bad with introductions. When I was 18 years old I was suffocating in a small town, under the abusive thumb of a tyrant with my autistic son. Overweight and wrought with guilt over my choices in life that led me to that point, I reached out for anything to give me a sense of control. I stumbled upon pro anorexia blogs and was hooked. It was a way to escape my life, gave me a chance to dream of something more, even if it was only a smaller waist. I was an awful mother and I struggle with that to this day. For 6 years I starved. I lost my son. I lost my house. My family. My mind... And all those extra pounds. Fat lot of good that did me.
   I had a blog of my own for several years and recorded every horrid act trying to reach a ridiculous goal weight. I flew out from my small town in Missouri to Washington DC and lost my last bit of sanity, came back home at 5'6, 88 lbs. dead in the water.


It took one long year, a hell of a move across country, cheek piercings, throwing out the scale, forgetting that the past me ever existed. I can eat a sandwich without fear now. I look at my pooched out belly and I no longer am blinded by mind, I see it for what it is. Just a belly. I fell in love. And now?



I'll let you know when I find out.lol